A new perspective...

First of all, note to self: Either memorize The Merry Peri password or come up with something easier. Something like, oh I don't know, Why do I keep losing the slip of paper with my password written on it???

Okay, moving on...

Years ago, baseball hero Yogi Berra was quoted as saying, "It's deja vu all over again." Do you remember that? (To be honest, I never actually heard him say that, but I read it once. Somewhere.) Anyway, I always found that comment to be funny. Until recently, though, I had no idea what it meant and no sense of how profound it really was. Then, one day in October, in a fit of organizational zeal, I started cleaning the dumping ground known as our library and found a list of annual goals I'd created in 1993.

Guess what? It was exactly the same as my List of Things To Do Before I'm 50. Sure, I'd accomplished a lot in 14 years, but the big things -- the things I wouldn't want to die without doing -- were still undone.

That was scary.

So, in late October, I made a decision to tackle the biggest To Do: Write a novel. I signed up for National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) and committed to writing a minimum of 50,000 words in November.

I figured this was a good idea because, during the summer, I'd finally accepted that, while I really, really wanted to write a novel, I didn't have a clue of how it was done. My work in progress had a nice first chapter but the rest was a thinly disguised therapy session in which all of the "good" characters were a lot like me and all of the "bad" characters were a lot like, well, everybody else. It had been hard, but I'd dumped the story and read everything about story and structure that I could find. Then I'd written character profiles and done some hard research.

With all that under my belt, I decided to complete a real first draft -- of the whole book -- in November.

But something happened. After 14 years of putting this same desire into the world, the universe wasn't so willing to make things easy. I'll be honest. When I set the goal of completing the first draft in November, I truly felt as though a voice replied, "Yeah, well. Heard that before. If you want it this time, prove it."

I assumed I might have a little writer's block or a few other delays. I had absolutely no idea what was in store.

First, after several years of procrastinating, I got a mammogram on Oct. 29. On Oct. 30, a rather breathless receptionist called and said, "There are some, um, abnormalities. We'd like you to come back. Soon."

The earliest they could see me was Nov. 6. As you can imagine, I didn't get a lot of writing done in the interim. What I did do was agonize about all of the things I wanted to do and all of the chances I'd squandered. I did a lot of bargaining and I made a lot of promises ~~ and I swear, I continued to hear a voice in my head saying, "Prove it. Prove it."

The good news is that on Nov. 6, after another mammogram and two ultrasounds, I was told that I was fine! Yea!!! I figured I'd go home and write. Right?

Well, no.

Here's a brief list of some of the other things that happened in November:

* Someone broke into my car and stole my radio. (Good news: I only paid $69 for it at Car Toys!)
* My dad had a health crisis during cataract surgery.
* My mother, for reasons known only to her, began to dabble in selective anorexia.
* My computer hard drive had a stroke.
* An organization I'd offered to do some volunteer writing for in June decided they needed my help...in November.

There were other things too. I'd guess an average of one calamity every other day.

Prove it. Prove it.

Yeah, right.

Actually, Yeah! Right!

Here's what I learned last month:

1) It is deja vu all over again...until one day it's not.
2) Life is either going to be full of I Wish I Hads or I'm Glad I Dids.
3) A really bad first draft can be edited into a fantastic book. An excellent first chapter means nothing if that's all there is.

This is turning into a very long post, so here's the short story: That first draft? Done! I mean, totally, completely, thoroughly DONE!!! 50,000 words? Yep...and more!

Second draft? Underway...and set to be finished early next month.

Am I glad to have experienced all that happened in November? Uh, no. Not really.

Am I glad that, in the midst of everything, I heard the words, "Prove it! Prove it!"

For sure.

What's your theme song?

Carleen Brice asked this recently on her blog. What a terrific question. If music stirs the spirit and lyrics arouse the mind, we should all have our own theme song, shouldn't we?

Here's mine. It's Proud by Heather Small. It's the theme song for me, for my novel -- and (here's positive visualization talking) for the movie I see being made from my book!

Wonderful lyrics, yes?

I didn't chew.

While reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, I gulped each chapter rather than reading slowly and savoring the book. I didn't pause to study the very, very fine line Ms. Rowling occasionally drew between her mythical society and current, real world affairs. I didn't linger to laugh at the sentence, near the end, that appeared to be a friendly nod to Aliens II.

At the end of my romp through the last of the Harry Potter series, I discovered something interesting, though.

The book, while exceptional, wasn't flawless. Every sentence wasn't perfect; every word wasn't gold. What they were, however, were pure J.K. Rowling. Her imagination. Her prose. Her best.

All of which reminds me that striving for perfection, holding on to your creative work until it's absolutely beyond reproach, isn't necessarily your greatest contribution to the world.

Sometimes you can change lives -- and change minds -- simply by doing your best.

Calling all writers!

Having a little trouble staying motivated? Author Tayari Jones has a great idea. She recommends creating a word-o-meter to keep track of your progress.

Tayari's tracking her word count on her blog, and I'm tracking mine here. Join the fun!

What I'm listening to right now: Silent Treatment by Michael Palmer, narrated by the wonderful George Guidall

Free, year-long writing seminar.

Attention writers: If you're looking for a way to improve your writing but lack either the time or the money for an MFA, check out the 2007 He Wrote/She Wrote Back online writing workshop. Jenny Crusie and Bob Mayer, co-authors of Don't Look Down and the upcoming Agnes and the Hitman, are conducting a year-long writing program on their website. You'll find an online syllabus, weekly mini-lectures and an active message board.

Cost? Zip. Nada. Zilch.

Playing on iTunes: Decoder Ring Theater podcast presenting The Red Panda Adventures. If you like old-time radio or harmless, silly fun, you'll love this series.

Back to work tomorrow.

Well, the long Memorial Day weekend is behind us. I hope you had a safe, happy and relaxing three days.

I certainly enjoyed the break from my various freelance writing jobs. In spite of the huge stack of work-related projects that really needed my attention, I biked, read, planted flowers (okay, supervised the planting of flowers) and made a sinfully huge stack of light, golden brown, crispy on the outside-moist of the inside, absolutely fabulous, almond and walnut waffles for breakfast. Yum!

Remember the novel I mentioned in Saturday's post? Well, Mergers & Acquisitions by Dana Vachon is history. I finished it today around noon.

I didn't really get into the book until around page 30, but after that, the writing was pure joy. It's hard to believe this Vachon's debut novel because his control of the craft is amazing. I recommend Mergers & Acquisitions highly.

Playing on iTunes: Writers on Writing podcast. Host: Barbara DeMarco-Barrett. Guests: Novelists Masha Hamilton, Ellen Sussman and Amanda Ward. This is a great podcast for writers. Get it free from iTunes or from DeMarco-Barrett's website here.